Last June, I bought Oksana a cute little digital camera that fits into an Altoids tin. That bit of information isn’t actually required for the enjoyment of this weblog entry, but it gives me a frame of reference on where to begin. Bear with me.

The camera was a Pentax Optio s40 and for a gift, it was more expensive than Oksana was comfortable asking. Of course, that mattered little to me; she wanted it, I was going to buy it for her. That I would be able to ask for a $300 reciprocal gift for my own birthday was a barely even considered.

As September approached, I gave careful consideration to what I wanted to receive in appreciation for my birth: A TiVo. Or, at least, a TiVo-like device.

I don’t actually know anyone that owns a TiVo, but, from my internet readings, I had read a lot about how they were going to revolutionize my TV watching. Epitomizing the counter-stereotype husband of a habitual channel changer, I was searching desperately for something revolutionary or, at the very least, alternative.

A TiVo is definitely that. You can think of it as a digital VCR, but actually it’s more of a PVR, or Personal Video Recorder, as that name is reserved for something that records TV programs directly to a hard disk. With a sprinkling of specialized hardware and software, a PVR can even allow you to do such vaunted actions as pause live TV, skip commercials, and automatically record your favorite shows without, gasp!, setting the time.

Sounds like silicon perfection, doesn’t it? Unfortunately, the reality isn’t all puppies and rainbows. While TiVo hypes their $99 specials, they don’t like to advertise the fact that their low-end units have small hard drives which will encourage you to use only the lowest quality recording settings. If the lack of expansion doesn’t scare you off, the monthly service fees will. TiVo charges $12 a month for their scheduling service, without which you’re left with an oversize paperweight. Sure, you can pay $249 for a lifetime subscription to the service, but what if they go out of business? Even assuming they’re around until the Second Coming, that’s another 250 clams added to the attention-grabbing introductory price. To the uninformed, that could seem dangerously close to a bait and switch.

So, I wanted a TiVo, but $300 would only pay for about half of the model I really wanted. Moreover, the lack of an upgrade path galled. What to do?

Why, build my own, of course. Too bad it took me six more months to do it.
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If I had my way, I’d keep all my friends nearby – I’m selfish that way – but I can’t deny that there’s something special about reconnecting with people that have been out of touch. Absence does indeed make the heart grow fonder.

Two weeks ago today, a friend sent me a link to a Juneau Empire article. That morning, the newspaper had published a story about an Argentinean couple who were spending a week in Juneau. There was mention of a poetry reading and solo concert at a local plant store, but otherwise it seemed like filler for a very slow news day.

Well, thank God for slow news days! The Argentinean couple turned out to be Magú and Alex Appella – Spanish teachers and friends whom I hadn’t seen in almost three over five years! Before I’d even finished reading the article, I had mentally rearranged my schedule to fit in the “concert” at The Plant People. The only problem was that I had to wait through 36 long hours. That evening after work, I told Oksana the big news and she picked up instantly on my excitement. She was more than happy to go with me to the show and meet the people I’ve often talked about.
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A few months ago a friend of mine, Mike Maas, heard that a theatre production of Hedwig and the Angry Inch was in the planning stages here in Juneau. Having been a big fan of the movie, he immediately made some phone calls to try to find out how he could, in some way, become a part of the show. Just when it seemed like he’d dead ended in unreturned phone calls, someone from Perseverance Theatre called – completely independent of his own inquiries, mind you – to offer him the off-stage role of Music Director and the on-stage role of Skszp. Anyone within shouting distance last November knows how thrilled he was.

Starting in December, Mike met with the cast and crew of Hedwig for many, many hours of rehearsals. Most days it seemed he would leave work and rehearse until almost midnight. On at least one occasion he worked on the play nine days straight without a day off to recuperate. We rescheduled our social gatherings around his new schedule and listened to his complaints about the rigors of 8-hour rehearsals contrasted with his excitement about how well things were coming together.

Much to my disappointment, Mike devoted so much of his free time to practicing that a video project we had planned to shoot was eventually shelved. I had no real desire to see the original Hedwig movie and, besides supporting a friend in his creative endeavors, had no real inclination to spend $44 so Oksana and I could see this show, either. I couldn’t understand why he was so overjoyed to be in a fringe show about a German transvestite with a failed sex-change operation, but we went last Saturday anyway.

You know what? I get it now. Hedwig and the Angry Inch fucking rocked! (Before the show, Mike asked us, “Are you ready to RAWK?!” It’s never “rock” with Mike, it’s always a throw-the-goat, Billy Idol sneer, “RAWK!!”)
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If you’ve been wondering why I haven’t posted an entry to my site in over 6 weeks, wonder no more. Ever since I started up this blog, I’ve wanted to write about the Halloween where I dressed up as Darth Maul… and here it is. It’s out of control, off the hook, up in your grill. If the MS Word stats are to be believed, this entry contains slightly more than 12,000 words typed out over 1,000+ minutes. With two drafts I made well over 1,000 “revisions.” If you figure a “page” is anywhere from 200 to 250 words – this entry somewhere between 48 and 60 pages of text. As they say at Idlewords: Brevity is for the weak!

I wouldn’t expect anyone to sit in front of their monitor long enough to read this in one sitting; therefore, I’ve put in “chapter breaks” at convenient stopping points. Good luck!

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I’ve never been much of a fan of Halloween. Oh, sure, as a kid I looked forward to amassing large piles of candy through the implementation of the normal traditions, but it was never really one of those holidays that I anticipated with fervor. Despite a general lack of enthusiasm on my part, I have nonetheless had many memorable experiences on All Saints’ Eve.

My earliest memory of Halloween wasn’t exactly a good one. I must have been about four years old, living in an apartment in Morehead City, North Carolina. My younger brother had not yet been born, though a quick mental calculation tells me that my parents must have already expected his imminent arrival. I bring this up only as a frame of reference – at four years of age, I was still too young to be trick or treating without adult supervision. Furthermore, I lacked the placebo security afforded by a sibling companion.

Our apartment complex, if I can trust some of my earliest memories, was laid out in a square. The front door to each of maybe 9 or 10 units faced inward to a small, shared courtyard. A sidewalk conveniently rimmed the courtyard, allowing easy access into each home while simultaneously providing a finite, circuitous pathway for young children who did not yet have the rampant Halloween candy ambition of older Americans.

I only remember one scene from that particular Halloween night; everything else I have reasoned out. Either my mother or father was escorting me door-to-door; of that, I am fairly certain. I probably had one of those hollow plastic orange pumpkins into which I could stash my treats, who knows? What I do know is that when we reached the fourth or fifth door and rang the doorbell, something bad happened.
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Don’t blame me; I didn’t vote!

When your family is from the East Coast and you’ve decided to make a life for yourself in Alaska, most of your traveling ends up taking more than twelve hours. It’s hard to get excited about a 3000 mile journey while it requires you to get up at 4:30am just so you can make it to the airport in time for the humiliating dissection of your luggage. Then, if you’re really lucky, you’ll have middle seats between two strangers for the next half-day, not to mention long layovers in airports with chairs intentionally designed to be uncomfortable.

I love flying, but somewhere along the way, I lost the excitement for it.

It’s precisely because most of my travel is extremely tedious that I wasn’t looking forward to flying to Fairbanks last Sunday. I suppose it didn’t help matters much that my trip was work related – three days of training on a new web portal isn’t exactly my idea of fun. The only good thing about traveling for business is that the University foots the bill, so there’s that. But hey, I wouldn’t want to get dooced, so enough about work.

I woke up Sunday morning with a lot to do before my plane was scheduled to leave at 1pm. I don’t know what it is about me, but despite my best intentions, I never seem to pack before the last minute. After going to bed rather late the night before (Curse you, World of Warcraft!), I awoke at 8:30am with my mind already creating a to-do list.

Before tackling the list, though, I started the day like most every other day that I manage to get up before Oksana. I stretched my arm into the partially closed refrigerator and cracked open a Diet Coke as quietly as I could. While ingesting my much-needed caffeine, I sat down at my desk and read some of my daily web sites. When my eyes could stay open without conscious effort, I started in on the first task on my list – backing up and transferring the files I’ll need on my laptop.

The rest of the morning was filled with all the things I should have done the day before: Laundry, shaving, packing, finding contact info for the hotel and printing out Internet maps of Fairbanks and the UAF campus. Somewhere during all that, Oksana came out of the bedroom and went back to sleep on the couch. Envy.
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This is long (5000 words!)… and long overdue. Other than myself, I only know of one other person out there that would really love to have my wedding writings finished. Thanks for the reminder, Anya.

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Friday
August 16, 2002

Another early morning. Luckily for Oksana, she could sleep in just a little bit longer than I could today. I got up at 7 and was out of the house by 7:45. First stop, Joe’s house – to pick up Noah and Rob.

Noah and Rob were ready to go and, because I needed to pick up some family members, we didn’t spend much idle time at Joe’s. Joe was interested in hiking the glacier with us, but he needed to go to work first to see if they could spare him for the morning. The plane was that if he could swing it, he would meet up with us at the trailhead. With Rob and Noah in two, I headed off to the dorms to pick up some rafters.

One of my college roommates, Mike, has been rafting the Mendenhall River as a summer job for the last few years. I had asked him this spring if he thought we could wrangle a free trip down the river for anyone that came up for the wedding. Not a problem – a date, time, and enough able-bodied rowers was all he’d need.

At the dorms we picked up my Mom, Don, and Mariah. Oksana, having roused herself from her slumber, showed up to escort her brother and nephew for the same trip. Everyone was ready to go except my brother, Kegan, who was nowhere to be found. He was supposed to meet us at 8am, but we couldn’t find him at the dorms. Hmmm. Maybe he thought we were to meet at the university, instead. Our train of cars drove down to the campus looking for my grandparent’s rental car – or any other sign of Kegan.

No luck. Eventually I was forced to run home and get my PDA so that we could call Kegan’s cell phone. We rang him up and found out that he was… waiting for us at the dorms! He must have shown up moments after we drove off. We returned to the dorm parking lot, added their car to our train, and made it to the head of the river just a little later than I’d hoped.

Mike was there and all ready to get everyone suited up and in the boat. While they were getting their feet sized for boots, their legs sized for rain pants, and their chests sized for life jackets, those of us not going took plenty of pictures and made plans to pick them up at the pull-out. Soon enough they grabbed their paddles, hopped into the boat, and floated up the lake towards the glacier.

Rob, Noah, and I took a few pictures of their departure and then heading off to Safeway to get some breakfast and some hiking food. While there, Noah gave Joe a call at work – no luck. There were too many important things for him to do at work.

We grabbed a breakfast of donuts (and coffee for Noah) and some food and drinks for our backpack before driving back to the same parking lot where we’d dropped off the rafters earlier. Once there I loaned out a couple pairs of shoes to Noah and Rob, we filled Noah’s pack with our supplies, and dressed in layers because the morning was a bit chilly. That was a mistake – 15 minutes into the hike and we were shedding them fast.
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